The diary, the Turkey and the Christmas presents

Hello all I am here with a diary entry as it has been a few days since I told you all the news, but as it has been a few days I have forgotten most of what happened. You see this was one of the main reasons for starting this diary in the first place, and one of the reasons I write it most nights. So now I am going to have to remember sort of what has happened.

I do know that we took Miss Jane from one place to another place and one of those places was home as Mr Charlie had gone to France to do important things. Then other stuff happened like………………. It has been windy and wet, seriously windy and wet round here and some of the trellis that was put up in the summer started to lean a bit so is now secured with a couple of props. You can’t beat a bit of triangulation to stop a thing blowing over in the wind, it is rather windy yet again.

Mr P who had been in hospital for an entire year finally made it home and he gave us a ring to say he was home and everything finally worked; that is in his house not in him, as bits of Mr P do not entirely work as designed by nature, or as some would have it, the Micro God of human bits. In fact a Christmas card from Mr P arrived this morning.

I have also finished my Christmas shopping; I always have serious problems Christmas shopping because I buy things and then hide them so folk will not find them, but then forget what I have bought and where they are hidden. Or worse still entirely forget I have bought them which is fine until you find a present for someone in June wrapped in snowmen paper  with Ho Ho Ho Merry Christmas written on it . . . . And I am serious about this I have done it more than once.

I have done loads of other stuff but I can’t remember what so that will have to be that. . . . . .     OOOOOoooooo yes, just to say the Ghost Writer got his car back yesterday and it had to have a new clutch and stuff, well that sounds expensive I am glad I don’t have to pay for it . . . . . . . . . . . . . . AH DAMN apparently I do, it appears that he says it is due to excessive ghost writing due to me rambling on about stuff no one is interested in like the three headed Seagull I chased away from the pond the other day or was it a Heron. I can remember but it did have three heads, or was it three legs

Oooooo I also saw a frog the other night too

I will now end with another Christmas Poem to cheer you all up

The Christmas Turkey has dug a tunnel

To avoid its terrible Fate

That goes under the perimeter fence

And under Bernard’s Gate

But the Turkey is a greedy bird

And now a huge big Beast

And will not fit into the hole it made

So will be our Christmas Feast

YUM

HAH HAHAHHAHHAH AH HAH AHHAH AH HAHHAH AH HA ha hah ah ha ha ha ha ha ha  

   

And finally Hello Charles and Quentin at GCHQ, you have done it again chaps, made the news yet again; I notice I don’t get a mention on the BBC typical and me your friendliest snooped upon cyber-person, there is no justice.